Hump Thanksgiving Day

1. Hump the Government for giving us this wonderful holiday. It’s one of the things I actually like about our political nation.

2. Hump a few things I’m thankful for:
My family
A roof over our head
Our troops & our freedom
My job (as bad as I resent it sometimes)
Grandma’s dressing
O2 and H2O
Indoor plumbing, electricity, and central heat and air
Fire
Friends
My health

I have left out lots of stuff. I use this holiday as a time to be thankful for the things I have that I sometimes take for granted.

3. I wanna hump the people who commented on this “toy” I saw at the store last night. Crystal said it was probably a "Will I have a boyfriend" type deal. Nope. It's a "real" Ouija board. Nothing says Merry Christmas like summoning demons. I dunno if a pink one is in response to keeping things politically correct and/or that paranormal activity movie or not but some of the comments are… well… you decide. I am having a hard time telling if some of them are serious or not. Here’s a link to the comments.

4. Hump all of the support we have seen over the last few weeks. It’s seems that the more people try to bring us down; we are showed more love by people that want just the opposite. Thank you! You know who you are. You guys are the reason I was able to go to the store in #3. Our kids will have some Christmas this year.

5. Hump the GI lab tech that gave me at least 3-4 hours of good laughs. Oh how I wish Crystal were blogging again because she can tell it way better than I could. When she was asking for a stool sample she said “Would you like to drop it now or send it in later?” Ok, first of all… “Would I like to drop it NOW?” What! Like I’m just holding onto it for the right moment. Okayyy. If I were saving it for later, how would you prefer I “send it in?” You want a stamp on a Ziploc baggie right above your address written in sharpie? Gross! Needless to say, yesterday was a crappy day full of shitty puns.

I hope #5 doesn't ruin your holiday appetite. Have a Happy Thanksgiving. More Ambien stories to come.

Happy Thanksgiving

Even though it's Christmas stuff....

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Ambien Story

I have several more stories to post. If you don't see yours, don't worry. If you want to send me one of your experiences with ambien or people on it, I would love to post it. Directions are here.


As a result of chronic insomnia, and combined with some of the heavy-duty psychotropic medications I take, my doctor had me on ambien CR for about a year. It seemed to work okay for a while, but lately it's started getting scary. I've had telephone conversations when I'm asleep. I've written blog posts and status updates on facebook when I'm asleep. I've waken up in the morning to find that I'd eaten a whole box of cookies in my sleep. I ate half a pizza in my sleep. It's terrifying. There's nothing like waking up in the morning and being told you talked to someone the night before, and you can't remember a lick of it.

My husband travels a lot for business, and we have two dogs. The big dog can make it through the night without having to go outside, but the little dog can't. The little dog also has a very persisent whimper that cannot be ignored. I can't tell you how many times I have gotten up in the morning to find my back door standing wide open. Apparently I'd gotten up during the night to let the little dog out, opened the back door and left it open and went back to bed. Our back yard is against a busy street. It's truly scary.

I can't tell you how many times I've been asked "Who did this?" or "Who got this out and left it out?" or "Who ate all the (whatever)?" when there was only one person it could have been. We have come to blame it all on the mythical leprechaun that hides behind the dryer and steals at least one sock out of every load.

There was one time I was asked, "What day did I get back from Texas?"

"UMMMmm.... You never went to Texas."

"Ha ha. Seriously, when did I get back?"

"Babe, you never went."

"Whatever! I hate it when you do this. I'll call my sister and ask her."
And that is during the day after the crap had worn off.

God Bless. Have a great weekend!

Hump Day

Hump Day List

1. Hump the economy for making our company cut back. I mentioned it before but in crunching some numbers, the unpaid furlough days I have to take are really going to suck during the holiday seasons. We had Crystal’s birthday yesterday. Thanksgiving is next week, Dad's birthday the second week of December, Christmas, then Harmony's, Devon's, and my birthday and within 10 days after Christmas.

2. Hump the people that think I owe them proof of something or anything. The only people that need proof have proof. Yeah, proof for you would be nice but it would also be feeding a small group of trolls that would dispute any proof offered because it's their agenda. I can her it now. "Oh it's photo shopped. You need to go out there with the news station, while God himself makes a public speech about it all in front of an audience of 10,000, and have CSI do DNA testing." ... It's pointless to attempt to convince people with that much hate in their heart. Especially to people that appear to be experts on something they know absolutely nada about. Makes you look smart. *wink*

3. Hump the corporations that are actually paying back the bailout money. (Mainly GM) I didn't put a lot of faith behind all of that working out but as least some are doing the right thing. I applaud thee.

4. Hump your friends and those unique unwritten guidelines that make your friends special ones. Some people, including myself, have taken a simple thing like friendship for granted. Its only when you think outside the box that you realize what a major factor friends and family can play in your life. I have recently looked at this one, constantly miserable, person and asked myself how one person could be so unhappy on a daily basis. I have been all but studying different ways to cheer her up but none of them have seemed to last more than about 5 minutes. Then it hit me. She always mentions going home to her cats and that's all she has. Wow. A life without friends. All she has to look forward to is going home, opening a can of tuna for cats, and talking to other bitter women on the net . It is hard for me to comprehend that people can live being unhappy and miserable when it's such an easy choice. I came from a really REALLY poor family that was too proud for government assistance. We had holes in out floor and opossums would crawl up through it and get into the house on a regular basis. The only heat we had came from the wood stove we had in the living room and we only had one window A/C unit for our whole house yet my mom, a single mother of 2 kids managed to work her way up, without assistance, to being able to move us to the city where we would eventually be shell shocked by what assholes city folk can be. As broke as we were, I don't remember many, if any, unhappy times. Too many people put their happiness in money, material tings, or whatever else but the things that make the happiest of all are friend and family. I love you friends and almost all country folk. You make me happy. (Crystal, Mike, Brian, Dan, Carrie, Jamie, Barbara, Mom, Hannah, Virginia, Harmony, Devon, Julio, Anthony, Granny and Grandpapa, Uncle bobby, Vanna, Dad, Vicki, Brittney, Dan, Amber, Jason, Maw maw, Glenda, Eli, Gene, Don, Becky, Ken, Rachel, Scott, Jenna, Lisa, Sylvester, Uncle Lynn, Debbie, Jacklyn, Whittney, Tonya, Tracie, Jeremy.... and everyone I left out. I could go on and on for a while.)

5. Hump deer season this year. I have unpaid furlough days and very little money, might as well use that time to stock the freezer. Venison Spaghetti is my specialty. Mmmm MMmmm. Can't wait to get in touch with nature again and remember my forefathers that have gone before me. It's been 4 years since I've sat in the woods listening to the trees while watching the squirrels dance and turkey march. It really sets me at peace with the world.

God Bless You. Enjoy he rest of your hump day.

Ambien Story

Crystal has decided to take a break from the Internet and to make sure she shut her blog down. Probably not forever but at least for a little while. I don't know when she will be back up because she knida does this stuff without letting me in on anything. She is grateful for all her supporters and wants to let you all know that she isn't done.


If you have an Ambien story and want it posted, see the details here.

This person was in a similar situation as Crystal as far as mixing Ambien with other (mood altering) meds. Sometimes I wonder who gets hurt worse, the people on it or the people that have to endure what those people put you through. The effect this stuff has on some people is nuts and it's still something we battle against every now and again. You can NEVER imagine some of the things said during those times. Things that cut straight through you and bleed forever.

"I used to be on Ambien as well. I didn't drink while I was on it, but it made me hallucinate. I got up one night, dressed in nothing more than a t-shirt and underwear, grabbed my husband's lunch box (thinking it was my purse), put on one Croc and one high heel (imagine that outfit), and started out the door, convinced that I had an important appointment at Wal-Mart. My husband caught me as I opened the car door and brought me back in (literally kicking and screaming, because I was convinced that I was in the right and he was going to cause me to miss a very important appointment). I was very mean to him that night, for no reason at all. I didn't have a clue about why he was so pissed at me until I talked with him the next day."

And one from her husband.

"I work third shift. I came home from work one morning, and saw carrots everywhere. My wife was curled up on the couch asleep, but the cats were awake, running around chasing pieces of carrots that they were batting around the living room. I followed the carrot trail to the kitchen, where I saw an open bag of baby carrots and the largest knife in the house resting on the cutting board. My wife had taken about half the bag and cut the carrots up. Some carrots were cut into sticks, others in circles. I started to panic, because I knew that she wouldn't have done this if she was awake. I looked around and didn't see any blood, but I wanted to be sure, so I uncovered her and checked her fingers and hands. All of her fingers were there, and she didn't have any cuts, so I cleaned up the mess in the living room and kitchen before waking her up. When I woke her up, she thought I was joking until she saw the carrots in the trash. She didn't remember any of it."

Ambien

I have gotten all kinds of emails from people who have stories about either being on Ambien or dealing with someone on it. I would love to post some of them to give the uneducated some perspective. It's crazy because this was the hot topic a few days ago no the radio. I sent them something that happened a while back and they read it on-air. I thought I was the only one that had had to deal with this type of thing. There were dozens of people with stories similar to some of mine and that's just within the reach of the radio wave.

If you have an Ambien related story and don't mind if I post it, Please shoot me an e-mail with "Ambien Story" in the subject line to mrmcknob@gmail.com. Please let it be your final copy. (i.e. edit out names and other stuff you don't want out there) The goal is to be able to cut and paste at least a few of these a week over the next few weeks until I run out. Hopefully I'll never run out because as long as there is Ambien, there will be stories. People deserve to know.

If you have already sent your story to Crystal or myself and would like to share, you are going to have to send it with "Ambien Story" on the subject line. Thank all of you for your support on this.

Also, I want to thank the overwhelming amount of sympathetic e-mails and donations. It soothes my heart to see people giving in the spirit of good will. There is so much negativity out there and so many people trying to "bring others down." How low does one have to be to make THAT their main mission in life? I can't comprehend the negativity that some people possess.

Thank you all again for all the support and love you have for my family.

Swine flu deaths

You have to click to enlarge it!!!!

Delusional

Crystal has never wanted to talk to me about what happened the night I called the cops. All she would say is that she is mad at me. Up until today, I thought it was because I called the police on her. She kept telling me that people were e-mailing her about Dusty. (our old dog) I kept telling her to post it but she never would. I thought it was that she didn't want people to be mad at me.

NEWS FLASH: Mr. McKnob says, "If you don't like me, are mad at me, or disagree with me... Good for you. I don't care because tomorrow I'm going to get up, put my boots on, and live life as usual."

In that story I almost couldn't believe she was serious. I was furious at her because 90% of it was a total lie. Crystal isn't one to construct such a horrible story so I gave her a call. Before I realized that she was balling and in tears, I lashed out at her. "What the hell is up with this story on your blog?" She began to tell me that it is all my fault because I told her I was going to kill the dog.

OK. I did tell her that Dusty needed to be taken into the woods and be shot after I came home to see my entire house destroyed. But, that was weeks prior. I felt bad because Crystal and I weren't getting along during this period. Mostly because of the stupid shit she would say on ambien. She would say stuff like "There is a yellow and blue car outside and they want to talk to you." But, I'd go outside and nothing was there. Then when I asked her about it she would tell me that I was crazy. She either put on one hell of a show or really had no clue she was talking to me. I wouldn't find out until later that she was taking ambien and 2 other scripts that were not to be mixed together.

Apparently the OBGYN gave her one thing, the regular doc gave her another, and her physc gave her another. On that particular night, she threw alcohol into the mix. She was having a little get together and thought it would be fine to drink socially. I knew better and asked her not to but you can't convince someone that is not in their right mind. Besides I was there to keep an eye on her right. Yeah. Never think that. We had gotten into an argument earlier and I had given her a deadline to get rid of Dusty or we were through. When I confronted her on it that day she wigged out, told me my timing sucked and that she was looking for a home for him.

I have the boy scout motto tattooed in my brain. "Always be prepared." One of the guys down the street told me about this farmer down the road that LOVES dogs and takes in all kinds of strays. So, naturally, I went to look. Sure enough there was a huge yard with about 6-7 dogs. At least I think it was 6-7 because that's about how many were biting at my tires as I cut out. I also called the shelter. They wanted $40 to take him so i called the guy that took Daisy. He said He would as long as I brought him out there.

Dusty must have gotten out 3 times that night because he would dart out the door every time it was opened. There were times 2-3 days would go by and we would get a call saying that they'd found him and you could always hear his loud ass in the background. He almost NEVER stopped barking. EVER. That's one of the reasons he had to go. NONE of us could sleep through the night. He would bark and wake us up and then after Crystal would get him quiet Harmony would wake up from all the commotion. It was a cycle that needed to be broken.

I decided about 3rd time he got out that night to put my foot down and finally be rid of him. When I tried talking to Crystal about it she blew up and went into the backyard with her friend so they could talk privately, probably about me.

The time had come and I did what I had to do. Giving him away wasn't as emotional as one would think. With a new baby and no sleep it was almost as if a pressure was relieved.

I had to make it clear to Crystal and V that they couldn't bring every single stray dog home and that I don't like pets running around the house with a baby around, especially one as rough as Dusty was.

It would be nearly 3 hours before I heard from her again.

I went to bed only to be woken up by a pissed off, drunken, mascara running monster. She tried hitting me with the leash but I could tell she was jacked out of her friggin mind. I ran her a bath to calm her down as I had done before when she went off the deep end. She was crying so hard that she shouldn't catch her breath and at that point I thought it would be better to just turn the shower on so she wouldn't drown if I had to go check on the girls. It took a while to get her into the bathroom because she couldn't stand up. After about 15 mins in the shower she finally quit crying and went into what I call her zombie state. The had her eyes open but would say or do nothing. With her head tilted to one side she kept staring the the toilet.

I left to go make sure the girls were ok and when I got back she had gotten the bottle of Ambien off of the shelf just above the toilet and it looked like she was about to turn it up so i took it from her and flushed them. She started crying again and then started saying that she didn't deserve the kids and that she doesn't deserve to live. Then she said that she wanted to die. I didn't know if she was serious or not. I'm thinking I may have done the wrong thing by grilling her to see if she was serious or not.

She started shivering because the shower ran out of hot water and asked me to take her to bed. I finally got her dried off and in bed then I put a shirt on her all the while she is whimpering saying that she wants to die. I asked her if she was saying that to get back at me or if she really meant it. She said nothing but "I want to die!" over and over and over. At this point I was seriously pissed. She was getting back at me and wanted revenge because she knows I would never do ANYTHING to hurt her.

This went on for an hour and I had prepared to call 911 if she tried anything. Lots of things were said that I will take with me to the grave. The time finally came when I didn't think things were going to turn around so I made the call.

This was an extremely difficult point in our lives and I would only find out later that she thought she had killed Dusty and and a plethora of other things. How the hell could she have thought she killed a dog when she cant even kill a bug? No wonder this has been haunting her for some time now. I have been mad at her for putting me in that situation and she has been mad at me for putting her in the hospital.

This grudge alone has sparked all kinds of negativity in our marriage. Please, If someone you love doen't want to talk about a certain situation or event, I beg you to talk to them. Especially if one party was under the influence. It could save you lots of hurt and lots of hate.


Crystal,

I don't blame you. I blame the meds but you could have made better decisions that could have potentially avoided this. I'm glad it's over and you and I can get back to normal life. It's done.

Veterans Hump Day

I would like to personally thank ALL military personnel. (past, present, & future) Thank you for making it your job to fight to keep me and my family safe and free.

1. Hump a Veteran. It's the least you can do. As soon as I get off, I'm gonna track one down. You should do the same.

2. Hump the inventor of cookies. I love you and hate you. Why did you make them so tasty while you knew they would jack my stomach up? I haven't had cookies in forever, and until the other night and the next day it felt like I had fallen off of a 4 story building and landed stomach first onto a sharp boulder.

3. Hump the place I went to interview at the other day. You want me as an employee but you want me to take a $7/hr pay cut, have to pay an extra $200/month in health insurance, and to trade in my jeans for a new wardrobe of slacks and button up shirts. Well I guess you do. Thanks, but I think I'll pass.

4. Hump Google for having Holiday Spirit. They will be providing free WiFi at 47 airports through the end of the year. If for some bizarre reason you want to share the Hump Day List with others on the go, You can do it for free.

5. Hump the LHC and all people involved. Do we need this? What are the benefits v.s risks? Do you know what a theory is? It is a thought of how something works. Not factual evidence. I don't think people should be messing with this thing. It has more potential danger than good. I haven't been sucked into any of the 2012 conspiracies but they estimate that this thing will produce the "God Particle" in about 3 years. HMMmmm. Lets shut it off and leave it buried. If you haven't head of this thing, research it before reading the hotlink. I'm not proclaiming doom and gloom but I do think it's something that should be left the hell alone.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Large_Hadron_Collider

http://public.web.cern.ch/public/en/LHC/LHC-en.html

http://www.cnn.com/2009/TECH/11/11/lhc.large.hadron.collider.beam/index.html
_________________________________________________

Thanks for partaking in another one of my weekly mental flushes. Have a wonderful day and I will be stocking up on mental fiber to keep me regular.

One of those question thingys I'm totally addicted to.

I copied this questionnaire from Sadie that reads Crystal's blog. And, she's from Memphis.

1. What was the last thing you put in your mouth? Diet Mt. Dew

2. Where was your profile picture taken? On movie set of "I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry."

3. Can you play Guitar Hero? yeah, if they had a slow mo version.

4. Name someone who made you laugh today. What was it about? A co-worker. He is just an idiot.

5. How late did you stay up last night and why? Till 11:30. Because I was freaked out. I had my very first problem with my iMac. It wouldn't eject the disk. Finally figured out how. whew!

6. If you could move somewhere else where would you and why? Aruba. It's almost perfect.

7. Ever been kissed under fireworks? I dunno. Guess I really never made it a point to remember. I'm a pyro and I usually like to see the explosions.

8. Which of your friends lives closest to you? Dan. He's just down the street a bit.

9. Do you believe ex's can be friends? With benefits? Yes. Rarely but yeah. But definitely not if there are benefits involved

10. Do you like Dr. Pepper? It's good (that's all I'm allowed to say)

11. When was the last time you cried really hard? When I had didn't sleep for 2 days while Harmony was sick then I got swine flu and felt like death. (I made that up. I never cry. I 'm a man. DUH)

12. Who took your profile picture? I have no clue

13. Who was the last person you took a picture of? Harmony. Sunday after church on my phone.

14. Was yesterday better than today? Why? NO! yesterday was rough. Today is Ok so far.

15. Can you live a day without TV? Easily. Can't say the same for the kids though

16. Are you upset about anything now? Not really upset. A little bummed about money and my job situation.

17. Do you think relationships are ever really worth it? yeah. Sometimes. lol

18. Are you a bad influence? I could be. You have to ask people I actually influence. Good luck with finding someone to fit into that category.

19. Night out or night in? Depends on the money and the mood.

20. What items could you not go without during the day? Air conditioning, a vehicle, running water and my iPhone.

21. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital? Karen Busby. :(

22. What does the last text message in your inbox say? Haha will do! I IMd him and told him.

23. How do you feel about your life right now? Optimistic. There is HUGE potential for our situation. It just takes time and lots of hard work.

24. Do you hate anyone? I don't hate, I just strongly dislike a few people.

25. If we were to look in your Facebook inbox, what would we find? nothing remotely interesting.

26. Say you were given a drug test right now, would you pass? Yep, unless they test for the pain pills I have for my shoulder.

27. Has anyone ever called you perfect before? Yes. Crystal actually called me perfect. Must have been before she realized that I'm just a regular ass ol' dude. She might have been drinking at the time too. It was quite a while ago.

28. What song is stuck in your head? The same one that has been stuck in there since the 80's, the theme from Super Mario Brothers.

29. Someone knocks on your window at 2 a.m., whom do you want it to be? I dunno. Who took Ed McMahon's place with those big checks? (I asked a co-worker this question and he said "A horny, nekkid, big breasted blonde with amnesia.") <- Good answer

30. Do you (or did you) want to have grand kids before you’re 50? It's shaping up to be that way whether I want it or not.

31. Tell us your Saturday night. Get home from work, get cleaned up and spend time with the family.

32. Do you think too much or too little? Mostly too much but here lately I haven't had the time.

33. Do you smile a lot? I dunno really. Hmmm. Guess I should make it a point to.

Hump day

It's hump day again. (do I really need to say that when the post called Hump Day and it's put out on Hump Day?) Since my last post a lot has happened. Halloween came and went. Is it me, or does Halloween seem like it was a long time ago?

It was funny watching Harmony walk up to a door, try and squeeze her way in front of Virginia, look the candy giver and say"Shrigger shreet thank you" and sometimes just "Shrigger thank you," and wait for her portion of the goods. We went with our friends the Bulls at first, then we took the kids to Crystals parents and around that neighborhood. By the end of it, Harmony was dragging her little feet and her pumpkin was too heavy to lift so the people were trying to bend down and put a few pieces of candy in without spilling the rest in their bowl.

It was cold out. That's a green jacket over white lace sleeves

I am probably going to hear about this one. My shoes and camera bag (on the floor by the window) and her regular clothes (pink shirt) are visible on the floor. Crystal keeps a clean house. So clean in fact, it gets to be a little obsessive at times. So don't get the facts skewed.

____________________________________________________________________

And now for the Hump day list.

#1 Hump the guy at work that made it all click this morning when he said, "The only people that have problems are the ones that have sense." Wow. No wonder I work with a lot of people that seem to have no problems.

#2 Hump Microsft for charging for Windows 7. I paid a ton for Vista and it hasn't worked right since day one. You have been giving out free updates for Vista for the last year or so and all Windows 7 seems to be is Vista with the bugs worked out. So... Why not release it as an update instead of a whole new OS? Don't you think you owe it to all Windows users? Apparently not. THAT'S WHY I SWITCHED TO MAC. Snow leopard is only $30 because it is an update. You are lucky Microsoft. My wife HAS to use windows for work. She is still on Vista because we can't afford your upgrade... I mean NEW OS. I hate you greedy bastards. There I said it.

#3 Hump the economy. You have put my company in a bind and stripped all of it's employees of benefits. That includes me. It's funny how the Economy was of no concern to me 3 days ago, then BAM! It's sobering but at least I have a job.

#4 Hump people that e-mail me to tell me that my point of view is wrong. NO idiot, it's MY point of view. By all means, share yours with the world but don't tell me I'm wrong because I don't think like you do. Guess what? I have an opinion! Speaking of opinions, I based what I said about that Squidbillies show on one episode. I saw 2 more and they were almost unwatchable. As it stands the show is 1 for 3. I dunno if I can watch many more if they were like the last two.

#5 Hump people who can't drive normally. This isn't a HUGE problem in my commute but I will occasionally run across the idiot the makes a last minute turn with no signal into my lane almost hitting me. This person will usually give me the finger while yelling and waving their arms like they are on fire. Sometimes I wish they would catch fire. Quit being pissed, turn around, and keep your eyes on the road because you are about to run over another innocent driver.

Crystal's Birthday is in 13 days. What do women like for their birthday around $5? Geez. I wish I was kidding. Love you gals and guys. (Ladies first!)

Oh I almost forgot. Kandi asked me to post this link about domestic abuse. It's something she is very passionate about. What could it hurt.

Twittle

I am not fully understanding the whole twitter thingy. I added a bunch of you but don't see many posts but I do have about 18 buh-jillion tweets from people tweeting every 2 minutes about business ideas and other spam. Spammers are everywhere man. Waiting on the trolls to start in.

Someone please school me on the purpose of twitter. Is it like a micro blog? Do people really Blog, myspace, facebook, twitter, and text at the same time? If so, when do they find time to live? Do they put bits and pieces on different and want you to look at all of them to find out EXACTLY what they've been doing all day? And do people really look on all the different sites to find out? If so, I'm gunna need an assistant. Any volunteers?

Dang. I have a headache now. I'm gonna tweet about my headache and get back to living regular ass life.

I won a Jeep!!!

So I was with Crystal a church dinner or something similar. After saying Hi to everyone I left to go to the movie theatre, conveniently located right across the street. I walked in and got a drink at McDonald's, again conveniently located inside the theatre. Upon finishing the drink, someone pointed out that it was Monopoly time and to peel the stickers off of the cup. I did and won a friggin Jeep Wrangler. While I am not at all a fan of jeeps, I was still excited as hell to have a new ride. On top of that, I was about to start watching a movie I'd been waiting to see for weeks on the chalkboard at the front of the classroom.

I was actually inside a building that morphed into a school and was totally oblivious. Maybe it happened while I was in a state of bliss about winning the jeep.

When I realized that there wasn't going to be any movie, I did most anyone else would have done. I said "To hell it, I'm gunna go get my new ride" and left. As I walked through the doors of the church, I spotted Crystal talking to a guy I call brother Hezekiah. His name became Hezekiah when he stopped brushing his hair, got all shaggy, grew a full beard and started wearing a black leather motorcycle vest over long sleeved pastel blue shirts with black slacks. Crystal was thrilled to see that I'd won a new vehicle and we ran out of the building hand in hand on our way to the dealership to pick it up.

Ding dong doo deep.... ding dong doo deep... ding dong doo deep...

DANGITTTTTT. The alarm was going off.

You mean there is no new Jeep? No vehicle with defrost, or knobs, or a dash, a good transmission, or CV joints that don't knock when I turn the wheel? I shall call today a daymare because last night was pretty real right? (fingers crossed)

McDonald's does have the Monopoly game going right now. I am collecting game pieces from all the people at work and entering them online. So far I've won 50 MyCoke reward points. Yay me!!!

Today is my hump day. Tues - Sat doesn't suck any less this week. LOL

Hump Dat 10/28

Mr. Mcknob's list of this to hump on this weeks Hump day post. These are totally playful rants with a semi serious undertone. It's all in fun so don't get your drawers in a wad. K. Remember I love you all. Well... not you troll. Go away.

#1 Hump those tiny, uncomfortable and sometimes painful bits of popcorn that get stuck in your teeth. I hate em and move to find a way to eliminate them.

#2 Hump people that look down on others for their political stands and hump dirty politics. Politics are ridiculous now days. Yeah I said it and therefore I stand behind it. I also invite anyone, including members of congress, to argue the point with me. (p.s. I think 90% of politicians are corrupt)

#3 Hump the Squidbillies show. How dare they make fun of us like that. I cross all eight of my arms pissed of every time I see it on TV. We aren't all like that.

#4 Hump people that call Soccer "football." You obviously aren't a red blooded American and have never been to Texas Stadium to see a Cowboy's game. (I haven't been there yet so if you get a chance, I wanna go!) Futbol is not an American word. If I went to England and asked for chips, I wouldn't expect a bag of Lay's. Get it right people and stop arguing with me. I'm right... period.

#5 Hump airlines. All of them. You mean to tell me that you can put over a million dollars of sensitive electric equipment, high powered radars, radios that can reach for hundreds of miles, and an indestructible "black box" in your planes but nothing that will video record the cockpit? I really give 2 shits about a pilots privacy when my life is in his hands. If a doctor messes up during surgery, a patient (1) may die. If a pilot is asleep, I mean on his laptop and unaware of his surroundings for over an hour, he still has the life of many people in his hands. The pilots union stopped airlines from putting in security cameras in planes due to "privacy" issues. they get paid more than 3 times what I make I have cameras on me at work. What's the difference. Yeah, I'd prefer not to have them on me but I am not responsible for 100+ human lives either.

Points to ponder. =P

I've been tweeting and facebook'ing more these days. You are more than welcome to add me on either or both. If you follow me (twitter) let me know if I don't start following you within a few days so I can start following you. I am @mrmcknob on Twitter. I will have to find my facebook link and post it later. Can't do it at work. If someone has it, please post it in comments. Have a good day and rest of the week. I won't get to post much until we get back on our feet. Until then, I'll be working late.

Hump Day

I'm cranky today. Haven't got much sleep in the last 5 days because of my shoulder. It took an act of congress to get some pain meds and just got them yesterday. I finally got 8 hours of sleep last night.

#1 Hump all the dope-head em-effers that made it difficult for the rest of the world to get legitimate help. I hope your selfish highs were worth it. I'll never know.

#2 Hump mortgage lenders for making it damn near impossible for the blue collar class of people to qualify for a home loan. Especially the big bastards those same people helped bail out.

#3 Hump Apple for putting out new products like the new Magic Mouse with the new iMac. You bastards know I'm broke yet you tempt me with the new technological play pretties.

#4 Hump CSI the TV show. I get tired of you being on my TV 70% of the time the TV is on. Someone dies and you find the killer. WOW! I just predicted your next episode. Crystal LOVES that damned show.

#5 Hump the sorry bastards dumping decapitated deer carcases beside my house. You could donate the deer meat to the homeless. My kids play in your so called deer dumpin' grounds.

#6 Hump animal rescue places for charging a "$300 Donation" to adopt a friggin dog. I want to rescue one for the family not pay AKC registered prices. I've seen AKC labs for $200. Even though a lab would be WAY too big. Don't get me wrong, I understand there are fees associated with spaying and neutering along with worming and other meds but DAMN. $300 for a mutt. I love mutts. They typically aren't inbred like most purebreds. Most of the time they are smarter and just all around better dogs.

Too cute things.

Harmony and I had a chance to spend some quality time together today. I was getting her dressed and she stopped, grabbed my face and asked. "Daddy, you my big boy helper?"

"Yeah pumpkin, I'm your big boy helper."

"Mrs. Marry says I'm a big helper"

It tickled me to death. I'm her big boy. At bedtime I asked her if she had to potty. After 2 cups of juice and a cup of warm milk I just knew the answer would be YES. I was wrong... kind of. I knew she had to go and tried to coax her. "Baby, are you sure you don't have to potty. Daddy has to go potty."

"OK daddy, you go in mommy's bathroom like a big boy... go daddy before you pee pee on you self. You have a pee pee or poo poo?"

Why is it so cute coming from the other side? Hope it's not just me.

Thank you Peggy

I got an e-mail from one of my readers and she urged me to go see an ortho. I did and guess what, I have either a torn rotator cuff or tendonitis. I have to go to physical therapy for a few weeks to see if its tendonitis. They stuck a 4 inch needle in my shoulder and said it should help with the pain in a few days. I'll have to let you know in a few days cause right now.... DAAAAAAANG! It's throbbing. I am keeping a positive attitude about it and it didn't keep me up all night last night.

Have a great weekend. My grandparents will be at my mom's this weekend and I am taking the youngin' over there to let them have a field day with her. We might even check out the zoo. The electric wheel chairs are $22 a pop x2 grandparents plus senior admission we are looking at about $70 just for the 2 of them. I think they would enjoy it though. I will have to get plenty of pics if we go.

Hump Day

#1 Let's not hump this girl or her mother. Wow! Seriously? For a bacon double cheeseburger? I am at loss for words.


#2 Thanks goes to my good buddy Mike for this link. You can now hump this girl. You know she is clean. Looks like she even has a smooth texture. (please watch this video when you get a chance. Guys aren't the only ones that do it. I couldn't help but laugh my ass off. You might also find it hilarious unless you are a tad uptight and think it's disgusting.)

#3 Hump the first person to refer me to a doctor that specializes in shoulder pain in Memphis. I can't sleep sometimes because it hurts so bad. Dangit man.

#4 Hump Drew Carey for setting up a 1 million dollar challenge benefiting the LiveStrong organization. (speaking of things on TV. Hump the Cowboys for barely winning against the 0-5 Chiefs on Sunday.)

#5 Hump my family life which has drastically changed for the better over the past few weeks. I hope we keep trending in the right direction. And... MY GOODNESS... the wife has been on top of her game. I am happier than I have been in several years even though we have NO money. I think maybe the lack of money and extracurricular activities has brought us all a little closer together.

Shame on me for not blogging for a whole week.

It's Hump Day Again

Things to hump on this hump day...

1. Hump the lady from my post yesterday. She came to work today just as bitter as ever. Someone please hump her asap. I think if I tried, it might cause tension her in the office so I'm gonna leave it up to you.

2. Hump people that recycle. I am starting a new trend of being greener. I've already went 80% all organic on stuff for the yard. Call me a hippie I don't care.

3. Hump my new Internet connection. It's unbelievably fast. I average 12 down and 7 up. Who knew CenturyTel was that fast. Not me. And especially not for $50 a month on a year contract. (sorry for the crappy cell phone pic)

4. Hump the American spirit and people that help other people. There is a mayoral race happening in Memphis and people are asking the candidates what they plan on doing about the high grass at the house next door. Memphis is one of the top cities in the US for crime and murder and you are complaining about garbage, grass, and neighbors. I send a hump out to the people that pitch in and help their neighbor and community. Just think at the tax money that could be saved if the citizens took a little initiative and mowed that grass or helped their community instead of spending wasted time and effort bitching about it and looking up who to call. Who gets recognized more? People that bitch or people that do? Hell, while I'm on this recycle kick, might as well start a neighborhood watch too. I hate not really knowing my neighbors. I remember growing up after we moved into the city and everyone knew everyone for several streets over. And I'm not talking about just knew. We knew what time they went to bed, who was their house by what car was in the driveway, what they were doing for the holidays, and sometimes what they had for dinner. We NEVER had a break in. EVER.

5. Hump everyone making the most out of our current economic situation. God love ya. It's tough sometimes. Cutting out things that aren't necessities and clipping coupons. It's gotten that way for us and most of the people we are close to. Keep your chin up. Things will get better. At least most of us still have food, water, air to breathe, and a place to sleep.

You guys have a happy Hump Day. I love ya.

Don't forget to sign up for my mailing list. I don't spam. Fill out the box to the left under "Alerts and behind the blog info." Then confirm the e-mail.

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Random Man

Anyone ever see the TLC hoarding show? They are talking about it here saying people are holding on to everything from sears magazines from the 70's to having 8 broken sewing machines that they are "going to get fixed." It's scary. I used to be like that before I met Crystal. She has pretty much changed the way I hold onto stuff. She has a 6 month rule. It sucks sometimes because I really was going to build something with all that wood. It just rotted before I got around to it. :P

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Did you hear that they caught a 750 pound shark in Florida? Yeah. Probably the number one reason I don't do oceans. If it can catch a swordfish, it can catch my big ass.

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I saw online where someone cleaned out a plastic squeeze ketchup bottle and put pancake mix in it to make "no mess" pancakes. Brilliant idea!

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I may look into recycling. I've really just been to lazy to do it but I saw a few articles that will blow your freaking mind. Just one aluminum can can save so much energy. Man, as many Dr. Peppers as the family goes through. I could probably power my friggin house for a month with the energy saved from recycling the DP cans that come through my house in a month. I've read that one can recycled can save enough energy to power a TV anywhere from 2-4 hours.

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One of the ladies I work with is about 50 or so and could easily be a virgin. She is bitter at the world and has nothing to do with men. She believes almost every conspiracy theory and believes that the world is out to get her. Apparently her condo sits in a valley and with all the rain, got flooded and is costing her a ton of money. (She thinks Bush did it because Obama is a people person and would not have sent a flood to her.) She is crazy. So, understandably, we were all shocked when a bouquet of flowers showed up for her. The ladies flocked to her cubicle and wanted to know who they were from, what the card said, if she had been seeing someone, what color dye she is using on her hair..... you name it. Her only response was "they are probably from someone who feels sorry for me. I'm not reading the card. I need money not flowers."

WTF???? If I already didn't feel bad enough for her, I do now. :(

She will be on my hump day list tomorrow for sure.