Twittle

I am not fully understanding the whole twitter thingy. I added a bunch of you but don't see many posts but I do have about 18 buh-jillion tweets from people tweeting every 2 minutes about business ideas and other spam. Spammers are everywhere man. Waiting on the trolls to start in.

Someone please school me on the purpose of twitter. Is it like a micro blog? Do people really Blog, myspace, facebook, twitter, and text at the same time? If so, when do they find time to live? Do they put bits and pieces on different and want you to look at all of them to find out EXACTLY what they've been doing all day? And do people really look on all the different sites to find out? If so, I'm gunna need an assistant. Any volunteers?

Dang. I have a headache now. I'm gonna tweet about my headache and get back to living regular ass life.

I won a Jeep!!!

So I was with Crystal a church dinner or something similar. After saying Hi to everyone I left to go to the movie theatre, conveniently located right across the street. I walked in and got a drink at McDonald's, again conveniently located inside the theatre. Upon finishing the drink, someone pointed out that it was Monopoly time and to peel the stickers off of the cup. I did and won a friggin Jeep Wrangler. While I am not at all a fan of jeeps, I was still excited as hell to have a new ride. On top of that, I was about to start watching a movie I'd been waiting to see for weeks on the chalkboard at the front of the classroom.

I was actually inside a building that morphed into a school and was totally oblivious. Maybe it happened while I was in a state of bliss about winning the jeep.

When I realized that there wasn't going to be any movie, I did most anyone else would have done. I said "To hell it, I'm gunna go get my new ride" and left. As I walked through the doors of the church, I spotted Crystal talking to a guy I call brother Hezekiah. His name became Hezekiah when he stopped brushing his hair, got all shaggy, grew a full beard and started wearing a black leather motorcycle vest over long sleeved pastel blue shirts with black slacks. Crystal was thrilled to see that I'd won a new vehicle and we ran out of the building hand in hand on our way to the dealership to pick it up.

Ding dong doo deep.... ding dong doo deep... ding dong doo deep...

DANGITTTTTT. The alarm was going off.

You mean there is no new Jeep? No vehicle with defrost, or knobs, or a dash, a good transmission, or CV joints that don't knock when I turn the wheel? I shall call today a daymare because last night was pretty real right? (fingers crossed)

McDonald's does have the Monopoly game going right now. I am collecting game pieces from all the people at work and entering them online. So far I've won 50 MyCoke reward points. Yay me!!!

Today is my hump day. Tues - Sat doesn't suck any less this week. LOL

Hump Dat 10/28

Mr. Mcknob's list of this to hump on this weeks Hump day post. These are totally playful rants with a semi serious undertone. It's all in fun so don't get your drawers in a wad. K. Remember I love you all. Well... not you troll. Go away.

#1 Hump those tiny, uncomfortable and sometimes painful bits of popcorn that get stuck in your teeth. I hate em and move to find a way to eliminate them.

#2 Hump people that look down on others for their political stands and hump dirty politics. Politics are ridiculous now days. Yeah I said it and therefore I stand behind it. I also invite anyone, including members of congress, to argue the point with me. (p.s. I think 90% of politicians are corrupt)

#3 Hump the Squidbillies show. How dare they make fun of us like that. I cross all eight of my arms pissed of every time I see it on TV. We aren't all like that.

#4 Hump people that call Soccer "football." You obviously aren't a red blooded American and have never been to Texas Stadium to see a Cowboy's game. (I haven't been there yet so if you get a chance, I wanna go!) Futbol is not an American word. If I went to England and asked for chips, I wouldn't expect a bag of Lay's. Get it right people and stop arguing with me. I'm right... period.

#5 Hump airlines. All of them. You mean to tell me that you can put over a million dollars of sensitive electric equipment, high powered radars, radios that can reach for hundreds of miles, and an indestructible "black box" in your planes but nothing that will video record the cockpit? I really give 2 shits about a pilots privacy when my life is in his hands. If a doctor messes up during surgery, a patient (1) may die. If a pilot is asleep, I mean on his laptop and unaware of his surroundings for over an hour, he still has the life of many people in his hands. The pilots union stopped airlines from putting in security cameras in planes due to "privacy" issues. they get paid more than 3 times what I make I have cameras on me at work. What's the difference. Yeah, I'd prefer not to have them on me but I am not responsible for 100+ human lives either.

Points to ponder. =P

I've been tweeting and facebook'ing more these days. You are more than welcome to add me on either or both. If you follow me (twitter) let me know if I don't start following you within a few days so I can start following you. I am @mrmcknob on Twitter. I will have to find my facebook link and post it later. Can't do it at work. If someone has it, please post it in comments. Have a good day and rest of the week. I won't get to post much until we get back on our feet. Until then, I'll be working late.

Hump Day

I'm cranky today. Haven't got much sleep in the last 5 days because of my shoulder. It took an act of congress to get some pain meds and just got them yesterday. I finally got 8 hours of sleep last night.

#1 Hump all the dope-head em-effers that made it difficult for the rest of the world to get legitimate help. I hope your selfish highs were worth it. I'll never know.

#2 Hump mortgage lenders for making it damn near impossible for the blue collar class of people to qualify for a home loan. Especially the big bastards those same people helped bail out.

#3 Hump Apple for putting out new products like the new Magic Mouse with the new iMac. You bastards know I'm broke yet you tempt me with the new technological play pretties.

#4 Hump CSI the TV show. I get tired of you being on my TV 70% of the time the TV is on. Someone dies and you find the killer. WOW! I just predicted your next episode. Crystal LOVES that damned show.

#5 Hump the sorry bastards dumping decapitated deer carcases beside my house. You could donate the deer meat to the homeless. My kids play in your so called deer dumpin' grounds.

#6 Hump animal rescue places for charging a "$300 Donation" to adopt a friggin dog. I want to rescue one for the family not pay AKC registered prices. I've seen AKC labs for $200. Even though a lab would be WAY too big. Don't get me wrong, I understand there are fees associated with spaying and neutering along with worming and other meds but DAMN. $300 for a mutt. I love mutts. They typically aren't inbred like most purebreds. Most of the time they are smarter and just all around better dogs.

Too cute things.

Harmony and I had a chance to spend some quality time together today. I was getting her dressed and she stopped, grabbed my face and asked. "Daddy, you my big boy helper?"

"Yeah pumpkin, I'm your big boy helper."

"Mrs. Marry says I'm a big helper"

It tickled me to death. I'm her big boy. At bedtime I asked her if she had to potty. After 2 cups of juice and a cup of warm milk I just knew the answer would be YES. I was wrong... kind of. I knew she had to go and tried to coax her. "Baby, are you sure you don't have to potty. Daddy has to go potty."

"OK daddy, you go in mommy's bathroom like a big boy... go daddy before you pee pee on you self. You have a pee pee or poo poo?"

Why is it so cute coming from the other side? Hope it's not just me.

Thank you Peggy

I got an e-mail from one of my readers and she urged me to go see an ortho. I did and guess what, I have either a torn rotator cuff or tendonitis. I have to go to physical therapy for a few weeks to see if its tendonitis. They stuck a 4 inch needle in my shoulder and said it should help with the pain in a few days. I'll have to let you know in a few days cause right now.... DAAAAAAANG! It's throbbing. I am keeping a positive attitude about it and it didn't keep me up all night last night.

Have a great weekend. My grandparents will be at my mom's this weekend and I am taking the youngin' over there to let them have a field day with her. We might even check out the zoo. The electric wheel chairs are $22 a pop x2 grandparents plus senior admission we are looking at about $70 just for the 2 of them. I think they would enjoy it though. I will have to get plenty of pics if we go.

Hump Day

#1 Let's not hump this girl or her mother. Wow! Seriously? For a bacon double cheeseburger? I am at loss for words.


#2 Thanks goes to my good buddy Mike for this link. You can now hump this girl. You know she is clean. Looks like she even has a smooth texture. (please watch this video when you get a chance. Guys aren't the only ones that do it. I couldn't help but laugh my ass off. You might also find it hilarious unless you are a tad uptight and think it's disgusting.)

#3 Hump the first person to refer me to a doctor that specializes in shoulder pain in Memphis. I can't sleep sometimes because it hurts so bad. Dangit man.

#4 Hump Drew Carey for setting up a 1 million dollar challenge benefiting the LiveStrong organization. (speaking of things on TV. Hump the Cowboys for barely winning against the 0-5 Chiefs on Sunday.)

#5 Hump my family life which has drastically changed for the better over the past few weeks. I hope we keep trending in the right direction. And... MY GOODNESS... the wife has been on top of her game. I am happier than I have been in several years even though we have NO money. I think maybe the lack of money and extracurricular activities has brought us all a little closer together.

Shame on me for not blogging for a whole week.

It's Hump Day Again

Things to hump on this hump day...

1. Hump the lady from my post yesterday. She came to work today just as bitter as ever. Someone please hump her asap. I think if I tried, it might cause tension her in the office so I'm gonna leave it up to you.

2. Hump people that recycle. I am starting a new trend of being greener. I've already went 80% all organic on stuff for the yard. Call me a hippie I don't care.

3. Hump my new Internet connection. It's unbelievably fast. I average 12 down and 7 up. Who knew CenturyTel was that fast. Not me. And especially not for $50 a month on a year contract. (sorry for the crappy cell phone pic)

4. Hump the American spirit and people that help other people. There is a mayoral race happening in Memphis and people are asking the candidates what they plan on doing about the high grass at the house next door. Memphis is one of the top cities in the US for crime and murder and you are complaining about garbage, grass, and neighbors. I send a hump out to the people that pitch in and help their neighbor and community. Just think at the tax money that could be saved if the citizens took a little initiative and mowed that grass or helped their community instead of spending wasted time and effort bitching about it and looking up who to call. Who gets recognized more? People that bitch or people that do? Hell, while I'm on this recycle kick, might as well start a neighborhood watch too. I hate not really knowing my neighbors. I remember growing up after we moved into the city and everyone knew everyone for several streets over. And I'm not talking about just knew. We knew what time they went to bed, who was their house by what car was in the driveway, what they were doing for the holidays, and sometimes what they had for dinner. We NEVER had a break in. EVER.

5. Hump everyone making the most out of our current economic situation. God love ya. It's tough sometimes. Cutting out things that aren't necessities and clipping coupons. It's gotten that way for us and most of the people we are close to. Keep your chin up. Things will get better. At least most of us still have food, water, air to breathe, and a place to sleep.

You guys have a happy Hump Day. I love ya.

Don't forget to sign up for my mailing list. I don't spam. Fill out the box to the left under "Alerts and behind the blog info." Then confirm the e-mail.

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Random Man

Anyone ever see the TLC hoarding show? They are talking about it here saying people are holding on to everything from sears magazines from the 70's to having 8 broken sewing machines that they are "going to get fixed." It's scary. I used to be like that before I met Crystal. She has pretty much changed the way I hold onto stuff. She has a 6 month rule. It sucks sometimes because I really was going to build something with all that wood. It just rotted before I got around to it. :P

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Did you hear that they caught a 750 pound shark in Florida? Yeah. Probably the number one reason I don't do oceans. If it can catch a swordfish, it can catch my big ass.

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I saw online where someone cleaned out a plastic squeeze ketchup bottle and put pancake mix in it to make "no mess" pancakes. Brilliant idea!

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I may look into recycling. I've really just been to lazy to do it but I saw a few articles that will blow your freaking mind. Just one aluminum can can save so much energy. Man, as many Dr. Peppers as the family goes through. I could probably power my friggin house for a month with the energy saved from recycling the DP cans that come through my house in a month. I've read that one can recycled can save enough energy to power a TV anywhere from 2-4 hours.

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One of the ladies I work with is about 50 or so and could easily be a virgin. She is bitter at the world and has nothing to do with men. She believes almost every conspiracy theory and believes that the world is out to get her. Apparently her condo sits in a valley and with all the rain, got flooded and is costing her a ton of money. (She thinks Bush did it because Obama is a people person and would not have sent a flood to her.) She is crazy. So, understandably, we were all shocked when a bouquet of flowers showed up for her. The ladies flocked to her cubicle and wanted to know who they were from, what the card said, if she had been seeing someone, what color dye she is using on her hair..... you name it. Her only response was "they are probably from someone who feels sorry for me. I'm not reading the card. I need money not flowers."

WTF???? If I already didn't feel bad enough for her, I do now. :(

She will be on my hump day list tomorrow for sure.

How to tell the world it's the weekend!